The Other bunch of Chocolate Teapots (Railway Division)

Following on from First "bloody" Trans-Pennine yesterday - this morning it was Northern "bloody" Rail's turn to make a mockery out of the phrase "Train Company" - 0724 was 25 minutes late - so bus to Stalybridge (which due to transport integration enables you to "just miss" the 0735 - ha !) - today at work for 0850.

More when I get home including the pix from last night.... and the Buffet Bar Conservatory is now "open for business", so some pix to add in there as well !!!

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Last Night's "To Do" - ruined by TPW&nkers

First TransPennine are a bunch of tossers - allegedly official - they cannot disprove it - their crap train info system on Stalybridge Station is CRAP - their new booking office/waiting room is FIVE MONTHS BEHIND SCHEDULE - they can't even get something built let alone run a bloody train service - and whatever happened to "Keolis" ??

As you've gathered by now number 1 on the "To Do List" failed - left Mossley at 0724 - left Stalybridge at 0817 - due to complete and utter crap from a company called First Trans-Pennine - face it guys - you couldn't allegedly organise a p*ss up in a brewery - your electronic/computerised train info thing on the platform is crap - it lies - it might as well say "YOU CHOOSE" - cus it can't get the train times right - plus I believe you have your staff on Stalybridge Station - maybe give them a lesson or two in "communiciation to customers" - rather than teaching them to press buttons to ring out the recorded "who gives a sh*t" stuff - still it's nice to know that the recorded cr*p will say "sorry" (0-10 late), "very sorry (10 - 30 late) and "extremely sorry" (30+ late) - heard ALL OF THOSE this morning - you total ********* - read my post last night - my daughter had to be in Stoke for 0930 - she wasn't - YOUR FAULT - took me best part of two hours to get to work as well - YOUR FAULT ...

And what made it worse - I get to work - go on nationalrail.co.uk to find out WHY - and there's nothing there - which possibly proves you're a ********* as you had NO VALID EXCUSE FOR YOUR TOTAL INCOMPETENCE ON MONDAY 8th December 2008.

You should be totally ashamed of yourselves - it's pointless me writing to you as you will have Mr Spin who will write a "well spun" reply containing as much feeling/emotion as "Mrs Loudspeaker".. been there - wrote it - read it - you don't give a sh*t ..

Work got done - no time for paying cheque in or running off invites (arriving at work so late) - got to gig tonight mind .. more on that tomorrow - cus I won't be doing Chorley v Mossley ...

(600 pix tonight - eek !)

First Trans-Pennine - complete ****** apparently - sue me - and FAIL !!!
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Tomorrow - 8th December 2008 - "To Do List"

1 - Get up - go to work - ensure daughter on same train (she has recording session at 0930 .. in Stoke !).
2 - Do some work.
3 - Post sister's birthday card.
4 - Photocopy some invitations.
5 - Put cheque in bank.
6 - Eat lunch.
7 - Do some more work.
8 - Come home ... DRINK NO BEER ... because ..

9 - Drive back to Manchester (you all know how cr*p the last trains are) to see PowerQuest @ Santa's Hollow (think it's actually Satan's but ...) - I can't see this one getting called off at half-time !

An added bonus tomorrow night is that I've got the OK from PowerQuest management to take the "big bugger" with me - now it's a case of choosing which other lens to take as well as the 50mm f1.8 - don't know the venue, possible crowd size, anything - yep "shooting in the dark" as they say !!

10 - Come home - drink beer (oh yes must remember to buy some !) - check out my first attempt at gig photography "sans Fuji compact" .. fingers crossed, I don't make a total plonker of myself :-)

Going back to Football - and "Football Clubs in Trouble" - it looks like the team of my childhood/teens/and later - Stafford Rangers - have some 'problems' - the story only really surfaced yesterday after the Vauxhall game - so I do need to find out more - but I don't like what I'm hearing at the moment ..
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Durham City 0 Mossley 4 (abandoned - 43 minutes)

Who'd be a ref ?????? Paul Brown shortly after "calling a halt to proceedings" ...


Words are still failing me on this "game" - so all you get for now is two lots of pictures and a "rantette" ...

The Match

Before and After

In short - we should NEVER have left Mossley - if anything the match ref was originally let down by whoever did the 0900 inspection - obviously a local boy with no knowledge of artifical surfaces - they urgently need to talk to someone at Woodley regarding 3G Fieldturf maintenance - and we stuffed 'em - that old cliche "The same for both sides" - and Mossley adapted ...

I'll probably think of loads more - and stick it on later tonight - but for now ... grrrr...
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Friday the Fifth - A Welcome "Day Off"

.. for several reasons other than "work ---- arrrrgh ---- begone !" - a meeting up at school - followed by a doctor's appointment - I may be virtually smoke free in the smoking zone these days but the drugs are still required (when doing 25/30 fags a day I was getting through a blue(salbutamol) inhaler in 19-21 days - these days they last me the best part of 55+ days - interesting eh what ??).

Doctor's over ... what next ?? I went up to Greenfield to see the new "nearly finished" station - it's 90% there - but the contractors have gone bust !! Checked out the "Railway" as well - Copper Dragon "Golden Pippin" - and Nettie behind the bar said, "How's Michelle doing ??" - our Mich used to work behind the bar there - and it's lovely to know that she's still remembered ...

Back to trains - and down to Stalybridge to get a look at the Conservatory during daylight hours - and a couple of extra pix put onto the "Conservatory Rebuild JAlbum" - see;

My "Day Off" Buffet Conservatory Update

.. then off to Ashton to look at shops and stuff.... I went into Woolworths - my God the vultures were out in some style - I bought a photo frame and a couple of other things, paid up at the counter - and wished the young lady the very best of luck for the future - I felt it was appreciated - and as I walked out of the shop I felt .... awful. These peeps are pretty much "out on their feet" at the moment, knowing they've got till Christmas - at least (at most ?) - yet I got really nice polite service - this was followed by a trip to Ashton HMV - got one of their "cheap books", went to the counter - and the difference in service was noticeable - if the guy had been wearing a name badge it would have said "I Don't Give a F**k" rather than "Jeff" - if anyone from 'HMVLand' is listening/watching - there's some possible recruits from Woolies who could replace the slapdash "staff" you have at your Ashton branch - no please - no thank you - carry on a conversation with someone else while serving me - sorry that's p*ss poor. I do use the Manchester HMV quite often - and they're AOK ( there's even a Dave Grohl lookalike working there - and I'm sure he lives in Stalybridge or near ...) - the Ashton staff have much to learn.

Ranty bit over - I then nipped down to the Topaz cafe as I knew there was a photo exhibition on - only to find it shut at 1500 (twas 1520) - I peeped through the window - only to see Tony (?) who did the "Rock Club" @ Stalybridge Buffet bar - then Glossop - now upstairs @ Stamford in 'Bridge - so after a bit of "jumping about" outside, attention was attracted and I got a quick "sneak in" - some good stuff there as well - and there's more to Topaz than just pix and cafe - check out ..

http://www.topaz-ashton.org/

On the next train to Stalybridge - for a couple of pints of Millstone "Grain Storm" - not been seen for a while - I was told (by the brewer - God I know really important peeps !) that there'd been a shortage of the particular hops required ( I'm sure he said New Zealand) - but it's back and it's lovely and it's probably gone off by now (2130 !!) - back to Mossley - a pint in the Brit and then home.....

.. and yes I've checked the works e-mails - once this morning after the dox appointment - and once tonight - they just don't deserve me do they ???!!??!

And ever the saddo ... here's the pix from today - I'll get me coat ...

Never a day off with a camera in y'pocket !!

Tomorrow - it's the 'booze bus' to Durham to watch Durham City smack Mossley big style - I firmly believe that Durham will win the Unibond 1 North this season - and having said what I've just said (not dissimilar to when Mossley were going to 2nd Placed Bamber Bridge - where they won 2-0 !) - I pray that the Lilywhites will "come up with the goods" once again - I've no intention of doing Roger Whittaker impersonations at 1645 tomorrow (if too young to know what the hell I'm taking about - Google/Wiki it !)
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Thursday the Fourth .....

Begone foul work - yes, day off tomorrow to do skool meeting and - hopefully - doctor's appointment - but being the sad barsteward I are, I may need to check stuff at work - may have to do the afternoon - because they're worth it ...

Never mind that - at the Buffet Bar tonight - who should walk in but the "driving force" behind it all .. viz Lord Tom Pendry ... Sylvia not in but keys were found to allow him into the "almost there" conservatory - I'm afraid he saw most of the stuff before the lights were turned on (!!) - but once on, I "went for it" again - check out the updated "Buffet Bar Conservatory" pixpage at this place:

co-starring Lord Tom Pendry - and Harold !

.. and yes - it was "Communication Breakdown" by Led Zep @ the City game last night - confirmed by Graham at work .. who was there !!!
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Wednesday the 3th of Dec 2008

Ramblings - with a couple of low res snaps to boot - whilst sitting here awaiting "Armageddon" according to the Michael Fish WeatherPerson Club - even so our street still has the remnants of Tuesday morning all over the road (no gritting here) and the pavements of course (gritting pavements - Tameside Council - ha - good job our Council Tax is "reasonable" - cus we get next to nowt for it ..).

The other "Armageddon" was Manchester tonight - allegedly - what with both City and United at home - saw nowt on my way home .... watched most of the City game on the telly - a disjointed first half indeed - and as ITV4 went to adverts at half-time ... I'M SURE I heard the strains of Led Zep's "Communication Breakdown" blaring over the speakers at COMStad - strangely ironic eh what - I'm sure that actual attendees (SJNR ??) can confirm/deny what I heard/dreamt ???? As you probably know(once getting round the Man U "headlines"), the final score was ...



(Caption competition revolves around "We were crap weren't we ?" - "Ja ! Bloody lucky at the end there Steve !")

So ... we fed the lizard (sorry, Wyatt the blue-tongued skink) instead ....at least he went for it - and gave his all, his 100% effort - when faced by ... mince !



So - I peep through the curtains - but the world has not ended as yet (2245) - one minor worry is that we're all going to Durham this weekend to see Mossley cause a major upset. Durham have a similar "carpet" to Woodley Sports (the 3G FieldTurf stuff) so should be "no problem (Woodley played last night when many didn't) - so why - oh why - was the Durham City home game against Newcastle Blue Star in the Presidents Cup called off on Tuesday night due to a frozen pitch - AND ... Mr Conspiracy is now asking WHY this postponment has tonight completely "disappeared" off the Unibond League website ... almost as if the game was never due to be played - all extremely fishy I feel .... the match now appears as a "tba" on the Unibond web site - who's hiding what eh what ????
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Tuesday the 2th of Dec 2008

Simply "snowy" pictures today ....

Our "back yard" @ 0700 this morning ....



On the way to the station @ 0715 - all trains AOK this morning for me anyway ...



Mossley Station tonight @ 1830 - not much gritting etc done during the day I notice ...



Same as ...



The bridge across from platform 2 - looks lethal - was certainly slippery - so "black marks" to Graham for today ...



Woodley v FCUM tonight ?? Sod that - I'm Woodley's albatross at the moment - and of course it's another one of them games where the "hangers on" outnumber ... etc etc etc . I'm off to watch "Survivors" !

LATE UPDATE @ 2245 - looks like Skelmersdale was the place to be tonight - a 10(ten)-0 win over Bamber Bridge - there must be an excuse - same as with FCUM's 0-3 reverse @ Woodley Sports ("FCUM Evening News" reckoned they were trying out some young 'uns ..)
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Monday 1st December 2008

Spotted in Belper on Saturday - reliably informed - it's been there a while (I'd obviously ate my shoots and left) !!!



Below you find the shambles that is the Stalybridge Station "revamp" - finish date was July (this year) - but there was a "pregnant pause" for about four weeks (a planning permission problem allegedly - but never proved/confirmed). Not to worry though - the big tower with the word "Stalybridge" is up there - still mostly building site below - good to know that the project has been correctly prioritised - y'know it could well be a Simon Carves Planning Department effort if I didn't know any better (with help from Excel bloody spreadsheets no doubt !!) ... I guarantee that the Buffet Bar Conservatory - pix here - will deffo be finished first !



... talking of priorities - I know a company who - for the first time in over 40 years - will not be holding a "Kids' Christmas Party" - obviously supplying Blackberrys to management and organising a company Christmas bash at a place which is awkward to get to for most of the staff - hence opening up the offer to the "well-paid" (!) agency staff to get the bums on the seats has caused this "loss of perk to staff" - never mind - we've lost our staff canteen, our company pension scheme - not much left really...

And many thanks for the birthday wishes from those who have ...

Belper Town vs Kidsgrove Athletic

.. so Saturday dawned - foggy as hell and not looking too conducive for the round ball game. Climbing out of Mossley over Hartshead Pike way (heading for Ashton and haircut !), we rose above the fog into bright sunlight - before going down the other side back into a thinnish "pea soup". Once the ears had been suitably lowered, we motored over to Belper and a quick glance whilst at the A6 traffic lights showed me that ChristChurch Meadow was certainly playable.

The game - a sluggish start for Belper who went behind on the quarter-hour to a penalty (it was about this time I got the call that the Mossley v Woodley game had been called off - frozen pitch apparently - but the fog was thick'n'all - which was what did for the Stalybridge v Farsley game). The penalty acted as the "wake up call" and the equaliser came just before half-time.

Second half - only going to be one winner, and it should really have been more than three at the end. Three points however, which leave Belper handily placed with several games in hand. The pictures are at:

This Place !

A bit of a drink last night - watched the FA Cup higlights - well done/hard luck to all the usual suspects (and some pretty crummy draws in the 3rd Round for some as well !!!). A walk over the Chevin after brekkie ... and back home ... what will next week bring - apart from a birthday on Monday (I'm 52 - eek !), a training course on Tuesday/Wednesday, and poss an appointment as the doctors on Friday. Football ??? Haven't a clue - and I'm sure the weather will have something to say about it as well ...
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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Friday

... so there ! The "State of the Nation" speech at work wasn't as bad as many of us expected - the Christmas bonus was announced (viz "You'll still have a Job in Jan" - ho ho !) - so just bought the normal two lotto tix for Saturday. Tonight was a late finish at work, enabling a meet with Mrs Smiffy in "big city" - a wander round the German Market in St Annes Square (eschewed the "bratwurst" and "gluwein" for a "German Ham Buttie") - and headed full pelt (uuh ?) into the Royal Exchange for "A Taste of Honey" - kids cocking up in the 60s - not much different to certain areas of Manchester 45 years on .... !!

A couple of pix ... first one showing some of the "steelwork" in the Royal Exchange (a pic inspired by having seen the "photography shop" on the markets 15 minutes before - Amy Gibbins ?? - although I went for the "straight at.." look rather than the angles/Dutch tilt-type stuff that featured heavily with her stuff) - even done this one "big" if you want to click on it ...



... and the usual "scenery pic before it starts" pic ..



One point of note - who was the "noisy snorer" up on the second gallery in the second half ???

Tomorrow - OK today - sees haircuts/trip to Belper (I get to see the Nailers v Kidsgrove) - Mossley are looking for a quick-fire "double" having beaten Woodley Sports 4-1 away last saturday - 'tis also FA Cup day so naturally thoughts will be with the "Two Tame Sides" still hanging in there - Curzon Ashton go to Kidderminster, and Droylsden head for Chesterfield. Wouldn't it be amazing if they both go through to the Third Round ... and drew each other !!!

(naturally the last four words were typed with tongue firmly in cheek !)

...edit 0145 - try this ....Ms Gibbins' pix were all b&w so ... I counter ....


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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Thursday - 2

Enough of this work sh*t - at Stalybridge Buffet Bar tonight, I had the good luck to be told "The padlock is off - due to painting of doors" - so I sneaked in - and binged out !!!!!

Check out ... with added piccies ...

http://mossleysmiffy.jalbum.net/BuffetBarConservatory2/

PS - remember all of these pix are from BabyCam

PPS - Don't tell Sylvia .....she'll probably bar me ................
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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Thursday - 1

OK I lied a bit - saw some of the Schalke v City game tonight - but only Benjani's goal (yet to see Stephen Ireland's effort)

But the big news tonight is .... the comedy sketch late on at work tonight - try this .....

Person 1 : " Visitor needs a copy of the database to take back with him today - can you do it ?"

Me (tapping away on pc) : "The database is rather large - 32 Gb in fact "

Person 1 : "And....?"

Me: "We can RAR it to a couple of gig" (for those who dont know - RAR is a "WinZIP equivalent)

Person 1: "Can he have it now then"

Me: "A RAR will take a few hours - we can then put it onto the FTP site for him to pick up - and uploading will also take a while"

Person 1 : "Oh ...."

(Person 1 and Person 2 then go to see my boss - Boss into office to see me)

Boss: " Well ?"

Me: repeat the above ...

Boss: "OK - will tell them exactly what you have told me - and what you told them before" (and because it now comes from the boss - they slink away ....)

This is the sort of comedy hour that is becoming sooooooo prevalent at work these days - when confronted with honesty / fact people then go "one level up" believing this will work - I tell you now there are a number of people working at our place who have COMPLETELY lost my respect for this kind of primary school/playground behaviour - not only that, it insults MY professionalism - I'm not being awkward - I tell it like it is (I've only been working in computers since 1985 - what do I know !!!) - and when people "whine upwards" - they go onto my "total w*nker list" - so that's two more today ........ tomorrow sees our "State of the Nation" speech from Mr Big ..... might be interesting / illuminating / helping towards the decision to buy 1/2/350 lotto tix on Friday....
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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Wednesday - Part 2

...sorry couldn't be bovvered with a part 2 - therefore thuswise so - the Part 1 suffix on the previous post was merely a ruse to tempt you all back ...ha !

... although Stalybridge Celtic have gone to Whitby and won 3-0 thus earning a trip to Stourbridge in the next round - and FCUM have lost to Boston United (yet the big story here is the Boston United supporters club coach windows being bricked - the FCUM fans are distancing themselves from this attack, blaming (depending what you read) local Bury "lads"/Radcliffe "chaps") ....

Don't forget - PowerQuest - 8th Dec - Manchester..

Oh yeah - it's going even further to ratsh*t @ work ........ starting to get scary - really - we've been through many a "redundancy exercise" over the past 10 years or so (and I've missed 'em all) ... my worry is we now have "ruthless" in charge rather than "bumbling/incompetent" - they may well catch up with me !!!

Feeling at work at the moment is summed up by ............. ta Munchy !



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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Wednesday - Part 1

... and what does the midweek bring ??? I'll tell ya - after all my "pro-wobblings" last night about the Congestion Charge Referendum ......

... I leave house at 0715 - the 0724 train is 4 minutes late .... it's bloody full when we leave Mossley - so full in fact that when we arrive at Stalybridge the guard opens "half a door" to let us "changelings" out before deciding how many to let on ...

... the 0735 to Man Picc is 7 minutes late - we then crawl down to ManPicc arriving at about 0803 - i.e. time for me to miss my 0758 or 0803 trains to Cheadle Hulme ...

... no worries - there's one at 0832 - so I wander off to Greggs for a (cheap) coffee ..

... I return to see 0832 train is ..... CANCELLED ............... next one to Cheadle Hulme is 0851 !

Arrive work about 0910 - nearly two hours after leaving Mossley....

Instant Karma / Bites y'Bum - I should say so .... even the 1812 off Stalybridge tonight back to Mossley was 11 minutes late !!

I may return with further wobblings later ....
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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Tuesday

... mmm ... well ... sunset over Cheadle Hulme station this evening anyone ??? (remember - tis only BabyCam)



... and look what came in the post today - here's mine ...and yes I DID sign it before splitting it and putting into envelopes A and B !!!



... and all ready to post in the morning .....



Tell you one thing - what with this and the apparent "resignation" of Tameside supremo Janet Callender, I headed for the Tameside Eye blog - however it seems pointless linking to it as it is now an "invited blog" only, and I don't appear to be on the list - so what's the point of that then - all sounds as suspicious as the goings-on in that big building in Ashton-under-Lyne - yes I've got rumours/hints about Ms Callender - but they're for "invited people" only as well - so nerrr to you too !!

Football tonight - best gloss over Hyde's result at Hednesford in the FA Trophy replay - I see Scott Partridge got a hat-trick for Sheffield FC in their 5-2 win over North Ferriby - to read about his earlier career, I'd recommend reading "Left Foot in the Grave" by Garry Nelson (his time as Torquay "manager") - the follow-up book to "Left Foot Forward" (Nelson's swansong as a Charlton player) - two very very good books - as a non-league chappie I enjoyed the Torquay experience a touch more - there was less money floating around ... my one possible crazy option for a game tonight (which would have involved NO beer and a drive) was thankfully called off - Buxton v Matlock Town appeared to be suffering from a frozen pitch (!) - no doubt there was "Eurotrash" tonight - I ate food, watched "Survivors" - then "Never Mind the Buzzcocks" then this ....

Don't forget - Vote YES - think about people other than yourself - about your children for example (if you've got any !) - think about the bigger picture - I guarantee we WON'T get £3 billion of improvements - extraneous sh*t will gobble up at least 40% of that - but think about Greater Manchester - don't get parochial - because that's when the "six finger" insults start to fly around .... it's a question of "What's in it for ALL OF US" not "What's in it for ME" - and if you're thinking the latter way - the "Thatcher disease" is obviously still alive and kicking after all these years ....

(Please note that the views of http://sixtamesides.blogspot.com are the views of Smiffy and Smiffy only - you do what you bloody well want - but please ensure that you can spell the word "consequences" and the phrase "long-term" - and if you don't live in Greater Manchester - tough !!)
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It's a "No-Midweek Football Week"- Monday

... what with the vagaries of the weather @ Whitby (i.e. Stalybridge NOT getting a draw up there and replaying tomorrow) and Bury (i.e. FCUM v Boston called off, so FCUM not @ Woodley on Tuesday) - and County Cups (Leigh Genesis in't' Co-op Cup so not playing Ashton United tonight) - I find myself stuck for footy this week - other options include crazy train connections that might just .... fail (i.e. Guiseley v BPA tomorrow) ....

... so what to offer the masses this week ?? If I mention the word Todd Rundgren, it tends to get millions of hits (I'll be honest, during yesterday's "mass tidy" I DID find the ticket stub from the 2004 gig at the Bridgewater Hall - might "snap" that one day !) - but today's ticket stub/s (unused as yet) is/are ..... Power Quest !



(suitably de-coloured and blurred to avoid ..) - yep, after several false starts, I finally met "Sophsky" tonight and exchanged money for tickets - many thanx for that - it's always good to have a gig to look forward to (remember it's not just football !!!) ... and if anyone else is interested in tickets - Satan's Hollow - 8th December - contact via

powerquestmanchester@googlemail.com

for £7 tickets instead of £8 on the door - and mention my name - I like kudos !!

I then got the train to Stalybridge - and these days it's too dark at night to see what's going on with the Conservatory re-build (although having had words tonight, it may be in my interest to "do a dash between trains" at 0730 tomorrow morning - we'll see how we do !) - HOWEVER - there's been an upgrade in the main bar at the Buffet - witness ....



...a new floor !!! It does feel more comfy (and a "touch warmer" someone said tonight - he had his shoes on as well !) - there's even little felt pads on the bar stools/chairs so they "slide" rather than "drag" !!! I may stick this pic on the Conservatory rebuild site (as I'm reliably informed that the wood does go through the door into the conservatory - but not very far, as there are - apparently - quarry tiles waiting to be laid in there....)

Tomorrow is another day - or as George Harrison once put it, "Yesterday, today was tomorrow - and tomorrow, today will be yesterday" ........ go on .... name that tune !!!!!!!
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Woodley Sports v Mossley

.. a comfortable win in the end against a team who I thought peformed much much better at Lancaster 7 days ago ... some pix at

My fingers got very very cold !

... can't say much else at the moment - we're on a "mass tidy" in house in preparation for ... you'e guessed it ... Christmas - well it did snow last night !
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Quality Street Peddle Filth ....

... I bought this in Somerfield Cheadle Hulme today - now if I was someone who would take offence at inferences in an earlier blog post about trains in Second World War Germany, I feel it only fair to offer this filth up to the intolerant masses - who should really be watching "I'm a Railway Executive - Get Me Out of Here (in a car)"

I give you .... MY PURPLE ONE (oooh err) - and all the double entendres that go with it - disgraceful ...

TGIF - what a (transport) week ........

Where do you start - don't worry this is going to be a fully justified attack on public transport - libellous even....let's go for it ... Network Rail - incompetent; Northern Rail - complete crap; First Trans-Pennine - useless- feel free to mix'n'match - that's a start anyway - I wouldn't trust any of those three "profit centres" to organise my Christmas party - they couldn't organise a p*ss up in a brewery !!!

Go back to Monday when the first train is over ten minutes late - this naturally has the "knock on" effect leaving me arriving at work over 30 minutes late - and therefore playing "catch-up" on my hours before I've even got to work - and what makes it worse is that I know this before I've even left Stalybridge !!!

Trains in the evening have been dutifully "late" - one thing that p*sses me off at Stockport is that you cannot board a Virgin Train heading towards Manchester - it's set-down only - and NO-ONE has ever given me a valid reason for this - whether it's Branson's arrogance/power trip (he should NEVER be allowed to forget that if it wasn't for Mike Oldfield and "Tubular Bells", he'd still be a "one bit" record shop owner in Notting Hill Gate) - but as such he's become a powerful w*nker who similarly appears to care little for his customers - "New Virgin" if you like - something like "New Labour" - nice people who suddenly get the power trip and become greedy bar stewards - remember Jack Straw and Harriet Harman (just two examples - there are many many more) who were once quite radical - look at them now ...... xenophobic fascists by any other name )

Meanwhile back on the platform ... so I'm down on hours even before arriving at work on Monday ... and Branson's Pendolinos (phew the speed ....) slow me down coming home - cus they get in the way of the trains that I AM allowed to catch (sorry this is me who spends over a grand a year on season tickets)... and then we get the absolute cr*p that is platform 13 on Manchester Piccadilly and the trains to Stalybridge - mostly the 1712 - an interesting time that is NEVER MET - EVERY DAY OF THE WEEK - EXCUSE MY SHOUTING BUT THIS TRAIN IS LATE EVERY DAY .. aah that's better - in fact today it was SO late I wandered off to catch the 1725 - because that left earlier .... late last week there was something in the papers about First Trans-Pennine having a 12% rise in passengers - it's just a crying shame that the size of their trains remain the same - they were overcrowded before this rise - now they're little more than cattle trucks in peak hours - our local paper this week shows our local MP - James "Photoshop" Purnell - suffering on a peak-hour train and saying "It's unacceptable" - sorry little Jimmy it's been unacceptable for many many years - 1995 ??? - John Major ??? - don't take this the wrong way, but I often think that the passengers on the 0735 to Auschwitz had a better ride (and it was probably on time) - and before the pc/moral high ground people start to whine - I'm talking about the train ride - not "what happened next" (I put this rider in because there are so many people out in "real world" today who are looking for something to hang their self-publicising hat on (think the Russell Brand/Jonny Woss/Jeremy Paxman type thingies - you get my drift) - so trains to Man Picc vs trains to Auschwitz is probably a handy hanger for these same sad people ....just get back to your John Sargeant petitions or something equally vital to the state of the nation ....)

To return to trains - the beauty of some of these late late trains is the "automated robowoman" - the guard can press "Button A" and we get the monotone/really emotional (ha !) announcement that "First Trans-Pennine apologise for the delay and the inconvenience caused" - that ALWAYS makes me feel better/comforted that they really really care ... my arse .... 'tis much the same on the platforms with these new "multi-million pound" high-tech passenger information systems - that say that the 1712 train is "on time" - despite the clock saying 1715 - and then - all of a sudden - the train becomes due at 1721 - I particularly like the one at Stalybridge where trains can "change places" regarding what comes in next ... I look at these things and think ... money well spent - a bit like the improvements to Stalybridge Booking Office - due for completion in July 2008 - still nowhere near finished - or the revamp of Greenfield Station that's ground to a halt because the contractor has allegedly "gone bust" - which naturally brings me on to the ... CONGESTION CHARGE ......!!!!

For those outside Greater Manchester ... the idea is to bring in a Congestion Charge - a little like Ken Livvies Greater London thingy (OK I guess it's Boris's Baby now) - but in Manc it's "Vote YES for the Congestion Charge - and we'll spend £3 billion on improving public transport". Now I - as a public transport user/sufferer - feel that the Congestion Charge is an absolute disgrace - because it's far too low.... I know many people who are opposed to it -they are the people who worship at the altar of the internal combustion engine - they are the people who make Mrs Smiffy's parking of our one car next to impossible when you live on a terraced street where two people - one house - two cars is the norm - on a street where I often think 70% of the people only ever leave the street on four wheels - they never walk !!!

However my support for the £3 billion public transport "sweetener" is tempered by the "view of the cynic" - how much of that £3 billion will actually go into public transport improvements - how much will be wasted on "consulatative exercises", "consultants fees", "meetings", "publicity exercises" and other such crap - my cynical guess is a good chunk - we will not get £3 billion of improvements - they talk of extra carriages on trains - that means that some of the £3 billion will go into private "profit making" companies - and the people who own the rolling stock are as much "profit centres" as Northern Rail/First Trans-Pennine etc - naturally the same goes for the deregulated (i.e. private profit based) bus companies - Stagecoach/First Bus etc etc.

So really a great idea will end up improving the lot of private companies - no doubt the people who run the congestion charge hardware/software will be some subbed-out profiteers on behalf of Greater Manchester Council - emphasis on the "on behalf" - they'll be in it for profit - and bollocks to the customers.

So yes the public transport users will get screwed for profit - as will the car owners/congestion charge payers - there'll be many many people making a few bob out of this on both sides.

Oh and before I forget - talking about useless tossers who don't give a monkeys about the customers - check out the new Northern Rail timetable (starts 14th December) - at present trains leave Mossley at 0654, 0724 and 0757 for Manchester - the new timetable shows me 0654, 0724 and then 0807 !! Yep - if you miss the 0724 - you've a 43 minute wait - at peak time !! My guess therefore is that more people will go for the already overcrowded 0724 - and God help those who get on at Ashton (two stops down) - it's already full at Mossley ! No doubt there will be copious apologies for the overcrowding - but never mind, Northern Rail will be able to post a good percentage increase on passenger traffic next year - with actually giving a toss !!! Magic isn't it ....

Just in case you've forgotten - the idea was to point out - Network Rail - incompetent; Northern Rail - complete crap; First Trans-Pennine - useless. I guess tomorrow I will be using the trains in my leisure time - no doubt they will be similarly p*ss poor (that is of course assuming they've not been replaced by buses - it is the weekend after all and no-one travels by train on Saturdays/Sundays do they ???)
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