Trains - as promised - the CRAP diatribe ....

...or to put it more bluntly - all train companies are shiT - and I really mean shIt. I could stop now and many people would understand - but hey let's go for the sHit I went through just these last seven days - yes there were floods, typhoons, earthquakes and other such "reasons" - for part of last week - but over the year you get the same old ShiT week in week out - they do not need a crisis to f*ck up - that's just a bonus - plus a good old "Act of God" enables "cancellations without reparations" - and they milk it for all they can get - oh yes ....

Oh and if it's fact that they- or you - want -

Monday 21Jan08 AM - 0724 from Mossley cancelled due to "staff shortages" i.e. someone got up late !! I caught a bus from Mossley to Stalybridge and only made the 0735 train to Piccadilly because it was 6 minutes late - then - and ONLY THEN after that - sh*t happened, weather wise....

Monday21Jan08 PM - Nowt from Piccadilly - get across to Victoria - "Go to Platform 6" - no "Go to Platform 3" - no "Go to Platform 4" - home late.

Tuesday22Jan08 AM - no trains from Stalybridge to Piccadilly - stayed on the Mossley train to Victoria - and ran like hell across Manchester to get the 0803 from Picc to Cheadle Hulme - got there with 90 seconds to spare - the train left at 0818 - 15 late - for NO dicernable - or communicable reason - I could have f*cking crawled across Manchester and still caught it.

Tuesday22Jan08PM - restricted trains from Picc - not only restricted - but f*cking overcrowded - there had been signs saying that Trans-Pennine and Northern Rail "are working to minimise disruption" and don't travel "unless it is deemed absolute (sic) necessary". So they DON'T put extra carriages on - they don't advertise their wares - if running - until the last minute - we had it bad - God help those travelling between Huddersfield and Leeds !! This whole "working to minimise disruption" crap - they don't care...I think I've said before, a lot of the time it's not incompetence but indifference - and that makes it a whole lot worse ....

Wednesday23Jan08AM- Another run from "Vic to Picc" - this worked - whoo hoo !

Wednesday23Jan08PM - Arrived at Picc to find a surprise "late change" - it was virtually empty because obviously it was a last minute "put on" - and you had to be there to catch it ...

Thursday24Jan08AM - Whoo hoo - back to normal - trains from Stalybridge to Picc - however - we have a "signalling problem" between Guide Bridge and Manchester - so we arrive at Picc 16 minutes late (0807) meaning I've missed my connections to Cheadle Hulme - and I've got nowt till 0832.

By now I'm bored with writing down the "stuff of the geek" - although I do have a Friday morning "note" that at Picc I got onto the 0758 to Cheadle Hulme at 0752 - but we STILL left Picc 5 minutes late.

Two stories from the weekend - first one told to me - Saturday AM - the 1157 from Mossley to Vic - it was busy but not overcrowded. However once it left Stalybridge - and only AFTER it left Stalybridge - it was announced that the train would NOT be stopping at Ashton-under-Lyne for "safety reasons" - just love the way the announcement was left until AFTER it had left Stalybridge station - but then again "communication" is not a word used by ANYONE in the rail business these days - you've gotta find out for yourselves.

Me and Mrs Smiffy went "down town" Saturday evening taking in a meal at La Vina on Deansgate (quick review - too noisy - table booked for 2030, sat down at 2100 - too noisy - sorry guys won't be going back - £3-15 for a pint of San Miguel in case you need to know). We came home on the last train to Mossley - the 2300 - a 4-car unit pulls up - only the first two cars were available - asking why we were told, "We're waiting to see if it's necessary to open up the back two" - I laughed loudly - the two carriages are packed on a normal Saturday night - but tonight we had the pink stetsons and illuminated deely boppers of several hundred Spice Girls fans - but hey we'll wait until you're all in each other's pockets before we open up the back two carriages - you lazy people - sod the customers, let's make it easy for the staff.

And road users moan about the odd coned-off lane ... trouble being that until this - or any - Government gives public transport a sporting chance with money and support - and we actually get something relating to a regular, efficient service - people will continue to buy bloody motor cars - people will continue to pollute the country - and poor old Mrs Smiffy with our "one car covering five people" will continue to having parking problems on our street with next door one way ("two people two cars") and next door t'other way ("three people three cars") - and that's just our immediate neighbours - our street is awash with not only multiple car households, but f*cking 4x4s and people parking on pavements and all the sort of sh*t that comes with a reliance of the f*cking internal f*cking combustion f*cking engine - and yes I do drive - but only when necessary - and with an efficient number of people in the car. How many of these gas guzzling lumps of sh*t spend 22 hours a day doing absolutely nothing apart from blocking streets and filling car parks ?

I think the day that the oil runs out will be celebrated by me in the same way that "Thatcher Resigns" was celebrated. Not long now I feel....

Meanwhile - football - tomorrow we need to see Mossley getting their *rses in gear in what has now become a "bit of a six pointer" against Radcliffe Borough.

PS - I WILL be walking to the game - even though it's SOOOO uphill, it's almost worth hiring a 4x4 ........